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作者︰shyungchongzeng 來(lai)源︰文章(zhang)閱讀網 時(shi)間︰2020-03-21 06:25 閱讀︰

 Dear Daughter:
親愛的女兒
  As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.

當(dang)我們(men)開(kai)車駛出哥倫比亞(ya)大學的時(shi)候,我想寫一封(feng)信(xin)給你,告訴你盤(pan)旋在(zai)我腦中的想法。

  First, I want to tell you how proud we are. Getting into Columbia is a real testament of what a great well-rounded student you are. Your academic, artistic, and social skills have truly blossomed in the last few years. Whether it is getting the highest grade in Calculus, completing your elegant fashion design, successfully selling your painted running shoes, or becoming one of the top orators in Model United Nations, you have become a talented and accomplished young woman. You should be as proud of yourself as we are.

首先,我想告訴你我們(men)為你感(gan)到jiao)乇鸞景痢= 緶妝妊ya)大學證(zheng)明你是(shi)一個全面發展的優秀學生,你的學業(ye)、藝術和社交(jiao)技能(neng)最近都有卓(zhuo)越的表現,無論是(shi)你在(zai)微積分上得了(liao)最高分,完(wan)成自己典(dian)雅的時(shi)尚的設計,成功賣出繪(hui)制(zhi)的跑(pao)鞋,還是(shi)在(zai)“模擬聯合國”演說(shuo)中成為表現最突出的人之一,你毫(hao)無疑問(wen)已(yi)經(jing)是(shi)一個多才(cai)多藝的女孩。你的父(fu)母為你感(gan)到驕傲,你也應(ying)該像(xiang)我們(men)一樣為自己感(gan)到自豪(hao)。

  I will always remember the first moment I held you in my arms. I felt a tingling sensation that directly touched my heart. It was an intoxicating feeling I will always have. It must be that "father-daughter connection" which will bind us for life. I will always remember singing you lullaby while I rocked you to sleep. When I put you down, it was always with both relief (she finally fell asleep!) and regret (wishing I could hold you longer). And I will always remember taking you to the playground, and watching you having so much fun. You were so cute and adorable, and that is why everybody loved you so.

我會永遠記得第一次將(jiang)你抱(bao)在(zai)臂彎(wan)的那一刻,一種新鮮激(ji)動的感(gan)覺瞬間觸動了(liao)我ye)男xin),那是(shi)一種永遠讓我陶醉的感(gan)覺,就是(shi)那種將(jiang)我們(men)的一生都聯結在(zai)一起(qi)的“父(fu)女情結”。我也常常想起(qi)我唱著催眠曲(qu)輕(qing)搖(yao)你入睡,當(dang)我把你放下(xia)的時(shi)候,常常覺得既解(jie)脫又(you)惋惜,一方面我想,她終于睡著了(liao)!另一方面,我又(you)多麼希望(wang)自己可以多抱(bao)你一會兒。我還記得帶(dai)你到運動場,看(kan)著你玩得那麼開(kai)心(xin),你是(shi)那樣可愛,所有人都非常愛你。

  You have been a great kid ever since you were born, always quiet, empathetic, attentive, and well-mannered. You were three when we built our house. I remember you quietly followed us every weekend for more than ten hours a day to get building supplies. You put up with that boring period without a fuss, happily ate hamburgers every meal in the car, sang with Barney until you fell asleep. When you went to Sunday Chinese school, you studied hard even though it was no fun for you. I cannot believe how lucky we are as parents to have a daughter like you.

你不但(dan)長得可愛,而且是(shi)個特別乖(guai)巧的孩子(zi)。你從不吵鬧(nao)、為人著想,既听話又(you)有禮貌。當(dang)你三(san)歲我們(men)建房子(zi)的時(shi)候,每個周末十多個小時(shi)你都靜靜地跟著我們(men)去運建築材料,三(san)餐在(zai)車上吃著漢堡,唱著兒歌(ge),唱累了(liao)就睡覺,一點(dian)都不嬌氣不抱(bao)怨(yuan)。你去上周日的nao)形難 鞍嗍shi),盡(jin)管一點(dian)也不覺得有趣,卻依(yi)然很努力。我們(men)做父(fu)母的能(neng)有像(xiang)你這樣的女兒真(zhen)的感(gan)到非常幸運

  You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model. As you saw when we departed, she misses you so much. And I know that you miss her just as much. There is nothing like family, and other than your parents, your sister is the one person who you can trust and confide in. She will be the one to take care of you, and the one you must take care of. There is nothing we wish more than that your sisterhood will continue to bond as you grow older, and that you will take care of each other throughout your lives. For the next four years, do have a short video chat with her every few days, and do email her when you have a chance.

你也是(shi)個很好的姐姐。雖然你們(men)姐妹以前也會打架,但(dan)是(shi)長大後,你們(men)真(zhen)的成為了(liao)好朋(peng)友妹妹很愛你,很喜(xi)歡(huan)逗你笑,她把你當(dang)成她的榜樣看(kan)待。我們(men)開(kai)車離(li)開(kai)哥大後,她非常想你,我知道你也很想她。世界(jie)上最寶(bao)貴的就是(shi)家人。和父(fu)母一樣,妹妹就是(shi)你最可以信(xin)任(ren)的人。隨著年齡的增長,你們(men)姐妹之間的情誼不變,你們(men)互(hu)相照應(ying),彼(bi)此(ci)關心(xin),這就是(shi)我最希望(wang)見到的事情了(liao)。在(zai)你的大學四年,有空時(shi)你一huan)ㄒ 38妹檬悠盜liao)聊(liao)天,寫寫電子(zi)郵件。

  College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. You often question "what good is this course". I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you: "Education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten." What I mean by that is the materials taught isn't as important as you gaining the ability to learn a new subject, and the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn't critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.

大學將(jiang)是(shi)你人生最重(zhong)要的時(shi)光,在(zai)大學里你會發現學習的真(zhen)諦。你以前經(jing)常會問(wen)到 “這個課程有什麼用”,這是(shi)個好問(wen)題,但(dan)是(shi)我希望(wang)你理解(jie)︰“教(jiao)育的真(zhen)諦就是(shi)當(dang)你忘記一切(qie)所學到的東西之後所剩下(xia)的東西。”我ye)囊饉si)是(shi),最重(zhong)要的不是(shi)你學到的具體的nao) 叮 shi)你學習新事物和解(jie)決新問(wen)題的能(neng)力。這才(cai)是(shi)大學學習的真(zhen)正意義——這將(jiang)是(shi)你從被(bei)huan)  白 蜃災餮 暗慕錐危  竽慊岊涑梢桓齪芎玫淖匝?摺K裕 幢隳闥?牟皇shi)生活(huo)里所急需的,也要認真(zhen)看(kan)待大學里的每一門(men)功課,就算學習的技能(neng)你會忘記,學習的能(neng)力是(shi)你將(jiang)受(shou)用終身的。

  Do not fall into the trap of dogma. There is no single simple answer to any question. Remember during your high school debate class, I always asked you to take on the side that you don't believe in? I did that for a reason -- things rarely "black and white", and there are always many ways to look at a problem. You will become a better problem solver if you recognized that. This is called "critical thinking", and it is the most important thinking skill you need for your life. This also means you need to become tolerant and supportive of others. I will always remember when I went to my Ph.D. advisor and proposed a new thesis topic. He said "I don't agree with you, but I'll support you." After the years, I have learned this isn't just flexibility, it is encouragement of critical thinking, and an empowering style of leadership, and it has become a part of me. I hope it will become a part of you too.

不要被(bei)教(jiao)條所束縛,任(ren)何問(wen)題都沒有一個唯一的簡單(dan)的答(da)案。還記得當(dang)我幫助你高中的辯(bian)論課程時(shi),我總是(shi)讓你站在(zai)你不認可的那一方來(lai)辯(bian)論嗎?我這麼做的理由(you)就是(shi)希望(wang)你能(neng)夠理解(jie)︰看(kan)待一個問(wen)題不應(ying)該非黑即白zhu) shi)有很多方法和角度。當(dang)你意識到這點(dian)的時(shi)候,你就會成為一個很好的解(jie)決問(wen)題者。這就是(shi)“批判的思(si)維”——你的一生都會需要的最重(zhong)要的思(si)考方式,這也意味著你還需要包容(rong)和支持不同于你的其他觀點(dian)。我永遠記得我去找我ye)牟bo)士導師提出了(liao)一個新論題,他告訴我︰“我不同意你,但(dan)我支持你。”多年後,我認識到這不僅僅是(shi)包容(rong),而是(shi)一種批判式思(si)考,更是(shi)令人折服的領導風格,現在(zai)這也變成了(liao)我ye)囊徊糠幀N蟻Mwang)這也能(neng)成為你的一部分。

  Follow your passion in college. Take courses you think you will enjoy. Don't be trapped in what others think or say. Steve Jobs says when you are in college, your passion will create many dots, and later in your life you will connect them. In his great speech given at Stanford commencement, he gave the great example where he took calligraphy, and a decade later, it became the basis of the beautiful Macintosh fonts, which later ignited desktop publishing, and brought wonderful tools like Microsoft Word to our lives. His expedition into calligraphy was a dot, and the Macintosh became the connecting line. So don't worry too much about what job you will have, and don't be too utilitarian, and if you like Japanese or Korean, go for it, even if your dad thinks "it's not useful" : ) Enjoy picking your dots, and be assured one day you will find your calling, and connect a beautiful curve through the dots.

在(zai)大學里你要追隨自己的激(ji)情和興趣,選(xuan)你感(gan)興趣的課程,不要困擾于別人怎麼ci)禱蛟趺聰搿J返俜#8226;喬布斯guai)zeng)經(jing)說(shuo)過,在(zai)大學里你的熱情會創(chuang)造出很多點(dian),在(zai)你隨後的生命中xin)慊嵐顏廡xie)點(dian)串聯起(qi)來(lai)。在(zai)他著名的斯坦福(fu)畢業(ye)典(dian)禮演講中,他舉了(liao)一個很好的例(li)子(zi)︰他在(zai)大學里修了(liao)看(kan)似毫(hao)無用處的書法,而十年後,這成了(liao)隻果Macintosh里漂亮(liang)字庫的基(ji)礎,而因為Macintosh有這麼好的字庫,才(cai)帶(dai)來(lai)了(liao)桌面出版(ban)和今天的辦公軟件(例(li)如(ru)微軟Office)。他對書法的探索就是(shi)一個點(dian),而隻果Macintosh把多個點(dian)聯結成了(liao)一條線。所以不要太擔(dan)心(xin)將(jiang)來(lai)你要做什麼樣的mu)?鰨 膊灰  憊 <偃ru)你喜(xi)歡(huan)日語或韓(han)語,就去學吧,即使你爸爸曾(zeng)認為那沒什麼用︰)盡(jin)興shuo)匱xuan)擇(ze)你的點(dian)吧,要有信(xin)念(nian)有一天機(ji)緣來(lai)臨時(shi),你會找ye)階約旱娜松姑   惶A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/meili/index1.html">美(mei)麗的曲(qu)線。

  Do your best in classes, but don't let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don't graduate with honors. So please don't give yourself pressure. During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don't be worried. The only thing that matters is that you learned. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either.

在(zai)功課上要盡(jin)力,但(dan)不要給自己太多壓力。你媽媽和我在(zai)成績上對你沒什麼要求,只要你能(neng)順利畢業(ye)並在(zai)這四年里學到了(liao)些(xie)東西,我們(men)就會很高興了(liao)。即便你畢業(ye)時(shi)沒有獲得優異的成績,你的哥倫比亞(ya)學位也將(jiang)帶(dai)你走(zou)得很遠。所以別給自己壓力。在(zai)你高中生活(huo)的最後幾fu)鱸攏 蛭 沽Ρ冉閑。 笱 昵胍步 liao),你過得很開(kai)心(xin),但(dan)是(shi)在(zai)最近的幾fu)魴瞧冢 愫孟xiang)開(kai)始緊(jin)張起(qi)來(lai)。(你注意到你緊(jin)張時(shi)會咬指(zhi)甲嗎?)千萬(wan)別擔(dan)心(xin),最重(zhong)要的是(shi)你在(zai)學習,你需要的唯一衡量是(shi)你的努力程度。成績只不過是(shi)虛榮的人用以吹噓(xu)和慵懶的人所恐懼的無聊(liao)數字而已(yi),而你既不虛榮也不hui)祭痢

  Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friends are often the best in life, because during college you are closer to them physically than to your family. Also, going through independence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience. Pick a few friends and become really close to them pick the ones who are genuine and sincere to you. Don't worry about their hobbies, grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developed some real friendships in high school in your last two years, so trust your instinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine and sincere person anyone would enjoy being your friend, so be confident, outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone, tell her. You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit of the doubt; don't stereotype and be forgiving. People are not perfect, so as long as they are genuine and sincere, trust them and be good to them. They will give back. This is my secret of success that I am genuine with people and trust them (unless they do something to lose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally I would be taken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you that that loss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18 years leading people, I have realized that only one thing matters to gain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you need to trust and respect others first. Whether it is for management, work, or friendship, this is something you should ponder.

最重(zhong)要的是(shi)在(zai)大學里你要交(jiao)一些(xie)朋(peng)友,快樂生活(huo)。大學的朋(peng)友往往是(shi)生命中最好的朋(peng)友,因為在(zai)大學里你和朋(peng)友能(neng)夠近距離(li)交(jiao)往。另外,在(zai)一塊兒成長,一起(qi)獨立,很自然地你們(men)就會緊(jin)緊(jin)地系在(zai)一起(qi),成為密友xuan)D閿ying)該挑(tao)選(xuan)一些(xie)真(zhen)誠誠懇ye)吶peng)友,跟他們(men)親近,別在(zai)乎他們(men)的愛好、成績、外表甚(shen)至性格。你在(zai)高中的最後兩年已(yi)經(jing)交(jiao)到了(liao)一些(xie)真(zhen)正的朋(peng)友,所以盡(jin)可以相信(xin)自己的nao)本  俳jiao)一些(xie)新朋(peng)友吧。你是(shi)一個真(zhen)誠的人,任(ren)何人都會喜(xi)歡(huan)跟你做朋(peng)友的,所以要自信(xin)、外向、主動一點(dian),如(ru)果你喜(xi)歡(huan)某人,就告訴她,就算她拒絕了(liao),你也沒有損(sun)失什麼。以最大的善(shan)意去對人,不要有成見,要寬容(rong)。人無完(wan)人,只要他們(men)很真(zhen)誠,就信(xin)任(ren)他們(men),對他們(men)友善(shan)。他們(men)將(jiang)給你相同的回報(bao),這是(shi)我成功的秘密——我以誠待人,信(xin)任(ren)他人(除非他們(men)做了(liao)失信(xin)于我ye)氖攏 S腥爍嫠噠庋惺shi)我會被(bei)佔便宜,他們(men)是(shi)對的,但(dan)是(shi)我可以告訴你︰以誠待人讓我ye)玫降腦對凍 A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/shiqu/index1.html">失去的。在(zai)我做管理的18年里,我yi)?揭患苤zhong)要的事——要想得到他人shuo)男xin)任(ren)和尊(zun)重(zhong),只有先去信(xin)任(ren)和尊(zun)重(zhong)他人。無論是(shi)管理、工作、交(jiao)友,這點(dian)都值得你參考。

  Do keep your high school friends, and stay connected to them, but do not use them as substitutes for college friendship, and do not spend too much time with them, because that would eat into your time to make new friends.

要和你高中時(shi)代的朋(peng)友保持聯系dan) dan)是(shi)不要用他們(men)來(lai)取代大學的友誼,也不要把全部的時(shi)間都花在(zai)老朋(peng)友身上,因為那樣你就會失去交(jiao)新朋(peng)友的機(ji)會了(liao)。

  Start planning for your summers early what would you like to do? Where would you like to live? What would you like to learn? What have you learned in college that might change your mind? I think your plan of studying fashion is good, and you should decide where you want to be, and get into the right courses. We of course hope you come back to Beijing, but you should go where you think is best for you.

你還要早(zao)點(dian)開(kai)始規劃你的暑假——你想做什麼?你想呆(dai)在(zai)哪兒?你想學點(dian)什麼?你在(zai)大學里學習是(shi)否會讓你有新的打算?我覺得你學習藝術設計的計劃很不錯(cuo),你應(ying)該想好你該去哪兒學習相應(ying)的課程。我們(men)當(dang)然希望(wang)你回到北京,但(dan)是(shi)最終的決定是(shi)你的。

  Whether it is summer-planning, or coursework planning, or picking a major, or managing your time, you should take control of your life. In the past, I have helped you quite a bit, whether it is in college application, designing your extracurricular activities, or picking the initial coursework. I will always be there for you, but the time has come for you to be in the driver's seat this is your life, and you need to be in control. I will always remember the exhilarating feeling in my life that I got to decide to skip kindergarten, that I got to decide to change to computer science major, that I got to decide to leave academia for Apple, that I got to decide to go to China, that I got to decide to go to Google, and most recently, that I got to decide to start my own business. Being able to decide means you get to live the life that you want to. Life is too short to live the life others do or others want you. Being in control feels great. Try it, and you'll love it!

不管是(shi)暑假計劃,功課規劃,抑或是(shi)選(xuan)專業(ye),管理時(shi)間,你都應(ying)該負責你的人生。過去不管是(shi)申請學校、設計課外活(huo)動或者選(xuan)擇(ze)最初的課程,我都從旁幫助了(liao)你不少。以後,我仍然會一直站你身旁,但(dan)是(shi)現在(zai)是(shi)你自己掌舵的時(shi)候了(liao)。我常常記起(qi)我生命中xin)切(qie)├釗甦穹艿氖shi)刻——在(zai)幼兒園決定跳級,決定轉到計算機(ji)科學專業(ye),決定離(li)開(kai)學術界(jie)選(xuan)擇(ze)Apple,決定回中國,決定選(xuan)擇(ze)Google,乃至最近選(xuan)擇(ze)創(chuang)辦我ye)男鹿 盡(jin)S心(xin)芰 醒xuan)擇(ze)意味著你會過上自己想要的生活(huo)。生命太短暫了(liao),你不能(neng)過別人想要你過的生活(huo)。掌控自己的生命是(shi)很棒的感(gan)覺,試(shi)試(shi)吧,你會愛上它的!

  I told your mom I'm writing this letter, and asked what she wanted me to say. She thought and said: "just ask her to take care of herself." Simple but deeply caring that is how your mother is, and that is why you love her so much. In this simple sentence is her hope that you will become independent in the way you take care of yourself that you will remember to take your medicine, that you will get enough sleep, that you will have a balanced diet, that you will get some exercise, and that you will go see a doctor whenever you don't feel good. An ancient Chinese proverb says that the most important thing to be nice to your parents is to take care of yourself. This is because your parents love you so much, and that if you are well, they will have comfort. You will understand this one day when you become a mother. But in the meantime, please listen to your mother and take care of yourself.

我告訴你媽媽我在(zai)寫這封(feng)信(xin),問(wen)她有什麼想對你說(shuo)的,她想了(liao)想,說(shuo)“讓她好好照顧自己”,很簡單(dan)卻飽含著真(zhen)切(qie)的mu)匭xin)——這一向是(shi)你深愛的媽媽的特點(dian)。這短短的一句話,是(shi)她想提醒你很多事情,比如(ru)要記得自己按時(shi)吃藥,好好睡覺,保持健(jian)康的飲(yin)食,適(shi)量運動,不舒服的時(shi)候要去看(kan)醫生等等。中國有句古(gu)語,說(shuo)“身體發膚,受(shou)之父(fu)母fu) 桓一偕耍   家病薄U餼浠暗囊饉si)用比較新的方法詮釋就是(shi)說(shuo)dan)焊fu)母最愛的就是(shi)你,所以照顧好自己就是(shi)孝順最好的方法。當(dang)你成為母親的那天,你就會理解(jie)這些(xie)。在(zai)那天之前,听媽媽的,你一huan)ㄒ 煤謎展俗約骸

  College is the four years where you have:

  •the greatest amount of free time

大學是(shi)你自由(you)時(shi)間最多的四年。

  •the first chance to be independent

大學是(shi)你第一次學會獨立的四年。

  •the most flexibility to change

大學是(shi)qiang)傷芐宰釙qiang)的四年。

  •the lowest risk for making mistakes

大學是(shi)犯錯(cuo)代價最低的四年。

  So please treasure your college years make the best of your free time, become an independent thinker in control of your destiny, evolve yourself into a bi-cultural talent, be bold to experiment, learn and grow through your successes and challenges.

所以,珍惜你的大學時(shi)光吧,好好mei)媚愕目障惺shi)間,成為掌握自己命運的獨立思(si)考者,發展自己的多元化(hua)才(cai)能(neng),大膽地去嘗試(shi),通過不huan)系某曬 吞tao)戰(zhan)來(lai)學習和成長,成為融匯(hui)中西的人才(cai)。

  When I faced the greatest challenge and opportunity in my life in 2005, you gave me a big hug and said "bonne chance", which means "good luck" and "good courage". Now I do the same for you. Bonne chance, my angel and princess. May Columbia become the happiest four years in your life, and may you blossom into just what you dream to be.

當(dang)我在(zai)2005年面對人生最大的挑(tao)戰(zhan)時(shi),你給了(liao)我大大的擁dang)bao),還跟我說(shuo)了(liao)一句法語“bonne chance”。這句話代表“祝(zhu)你勇(yong)敢,祝(zhu)你好運!”現在(zai),我也想跟你說(shuo)同樣的話,bonne chance,我ye)A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/tianshi/index1.html">天使和公主,希望(wang)哥倫比亞(ya)成為你一生中最快樂的四年,希望(wang)你成為你夢想成為的人!

      Love,
      愛你的,

      Dad (& Mom)

      爸爸(和媽媽)


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